Adorare

I cleansed my palate with gasoline today
You kissed my lips
Your match was lit
I immolated while you escaped
Stop - drop - role model?
Maybe
Extinguish me, lady
Put me out
Don't walk by while I'm dry
This is one hell of a drought
Put me out, put me out
My skin's ashen, in fumes
Don't you know that I worship?
My heart's enshrined to you
I am down on my knees
Igneous deformity
Hideous calamity
Don't give me up, dammit, please
What's the use
When I know you're a star
The light burned out so long ago
But I can't help that your gravity gets me going
Ellipse, I'm eclipsed
You persist, I resist
You insist, I'm remissed
I will cease to exist
If you cease and desist
So appease me with this
Won't you please just fall in the abyss?

Cliffhanger

When your eyes breeze through me like poetry
I feel like I'm falling from a cliff top
Right before I hit the ground, I am saved
By the grace of your gaze
Undermine my stubbornness with all that you are
Fire blazing, devouring, conquering the setting dark
Cliff diving couldn't defeat my awakening
In your steady, wind-rushed arms
I never do get used to salvation
Always attacking from the valley, marching the troops
To a surely insurmountable advancement
That is of course until you showed up
My resources were depleted
I was forced to the edge of a canyon's cliff
As I was prodded to the edge by my enemy
There you were, locking eyes with me
My grimace turned to a smile and my heart burst with joy
Life played back like a film in reverse
You were in every frame, smiling, laughing, dancing
We were so fragile
So enduring
So in love
A tear I didn't know my eyes concealed welled up as I smiled
When you smiled back at me, I smiled and said I loved you
Right before I hit the ground

Architecture Of Anger

Anger is a cage, but who is the prisoner?
Steel fortress shuns all visitors
Once you're in, you don't come out
If you're out, you won't ever make it in
The drawbridge is electrified
The walls are superconductive
The moat flows thick with sulfuric acid
Inside the fortress lies three men, guarding a secret
One is the architect
The other a maintenance man
The third a warden
Deep below the vaults lie a beast
The beast has not stopped howling for decades
Beaten, enslaved, depraved
It does not understand why it is there
It is hideous in form, unrelenting and volatile
It has destroyed the underbelly where a brilliant palace once stood
It destroyed every iteration of the palace several times
The warden wants it dead, but knows it is too strong
He locks it down and watches it, knowing it will kill if free
The maintenance man wants only to remain busily neutral
So long as his life can continue as it is
The architect is fascinated by it and quietly understands it
Even more so quietly, he empathizes with it
For years this has gone on
If only they knew that they were all parts of the same person
The architect
The worker
The warden
The beast
All are the prisoner in the cage of anger
All are the same person
That person is me
For so many years I have watched myself become consumed
I don't forgive. I don't forget. I don't let go.
Of anything.
Once you wrong me, you've wronged me forever
You mistrusted me once, doubted me once, questioned me once
I never live it down
I punish you forever
I punish myself tenfold
I understand your every fear
You were completely rational to doubt me and to question me
No human is perfect, especially not I
Yet I hold myself to such a standard, and you as well
That I cannot seem to let go of what you did to me
Nay, even more, I cannot seem to let go of what I did to you
I keep asking myself why you questioned, doubted, feared, mistrusted
I probe and probe until I become the problem
I drill and drill until I hate myself
Until I kill myself inside
Until I believe you want to kill me too
Anger is the cage
I am the beast
I am the worker
I am the warden
I am the architect
I am the prisoner
I don't know how to break free
But it's time I started trying

Fata Morgana

Inquisition lingers overhead
Maleficent minds prod my sanity
Lethe's rapids capsize the wayward vessel
No coastline menagerie in sight
In the still a ship appears
A distant reverie long forgot
My arms and legs stretch
Prepared to battle the riptides
The sun and moon exchange places twice
Upon the third twilight I arrive
There is no ship here
Just more of the vast sea
What was it I thought I saw?
Salvation? A second chance?
I saw what I wanted to see
Nonexistent opportunity
Did I waste my time swimming?
Did I do right to seize the moment?
It's all just an illusion
And like fools, we chase the bait

In Sorte Diaboli

Shade is just a lie
Heat penetrates skin
Blistering sun rises
Once again inopportune
Shadows crowd the soul
Cackling cacophony
Demons converse with skeletons
The dark lord lurks
Grim is the procession
Late is hour eleven
Hellfire is awaiting
The soul is lost
Mouths are open
No words are spoken
World turns once more
Judgment is here
Was this just a dream?
Wondering under the shade
Gaze upon the earth
Gaze upon hell
There is no refuge
Satan walks among us
Maybe he's one of us
Maybe us all

De Profundis

Bleeding out the day
We all bleed the same
Try to deny it
The dragon flies above
Scorching my beloved
I keep dying

Don't tempt me further
I can't light this candle anymore
My face is immolated
All of this is unrelated
God, I'm so frustrated
Won't you come and snuff this hatred?

Brother, ball and chain
Sister, forgotten my name
I'm torn apart
Mother, gone away
Father, hell awaits
Dead in my heart

Out of the depths
Out of the depths I tremble, crying out
But tears don't fall so easy from these eyes
Out of control
Out of control I tear my insides out
In hope some day my soul is pacified

Sacrifice

Death reigns inside my veins
I scatter ashes where I roam
Firelight inside these eyes
This world will never be my home

You can collect all you want
You can reject all you don't
You can pretend you're someone
It doesn't matter
Cuz at the end of the day
You're gonna die anyway
You might think you can be saved
But you won't

Some say the world will end in fire
Some say in ice
You're in such a hurry to expire
No sacrifice

Scorched earth is my rebirth
And like a phoenix I will rise
Carry the winds of change
While you await your home's demise

You know you saw it coming
You didn't change anything
You hate the doom that it brings
But you have earned it
You're only given one life
If you're not living it right
You better change it because
You can't return it

Some say the world will end in fire
Some say in ice
You're in such a hurry to expire
No sacrifice
Too lazy to make life better
You just roll the dice
Hell bent on your own pleasure
Nothing comes without sacrifice

You can't have it all
Sometimes you have to choose
Life is a gom jabbar
You've got so much to prove
So put your hand in the box
Don't be afraid of the pain
Fear is the mindkiller
But you can come away unscathed